Positive Parenting Case Studies
All names have been changed to protect the privacy of individuals & their family
Sandra: Three Year Old Tantrums
Let me share with you the story of Sandra
She came to me concerned about her 3 year old son's massive tantrums around screen time in her family, particularly when she or her husband would say it was enough.
Sandra recently had a baby and as any mum knows often the older child is given the ipad or your phone just so you can cook dinner or have a shower.
Her son has now developed these massive tantrums when the phone is taken away from him, or when he wants it and his parents say no.
They had tried the 1,2,3 Magic process but it wasn't working and she came to me for some help.
The process we worked together through was:
Firstly, reassuring her that this is normal childhood behaviour as he is having an emotional reaction to not getting his way, which is part of how he grows and develops and learns about his place in the world. It is not a reflection on their parenting or him being "a bad" kid.
Secondly we worked out what she wanted to happen including:
- What an acceptable length of time for her son to spend watching a device
- A management plan for screen time including a way of breaking it down to shorter segments at different times.
- The consequences for her son about what would happen if he had a big tantrum
The next step was for her to chat to her husband about what we discussed so that they could create this plan together so that there was a join effort and a united approach to have the greatest impact on this issue.
Then it was time for them to chat to their son. We discussed what she should tell him:
- The new family limits / rules around screen time
- Why this is important
- What is expected behaviour of everyone - child & parents
- What the consequences of having a tantrum would be.
To support this process I discussed with her my discipline structure - my 5 C's of Discipline (Calm, contain, connect, correct, communicate love)
As well as the important of positive behaviour reinforcement and quality time for her son to have with both his parents.
Since we worked together she reports that things having been going really well at home and that her son has been even more cuddly with her. ❤️
I was so pleased to hear that everything was working for them. It will continue to get better as this way of parenting becomes the norm for them.
I helped provide her with a gentle and respectful plan so that she could modify the behaviour in her child so that she was happier, family life was easier and they could get everyone back on track.